Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Drama, Seriously!

Could my life have more drama. It's not even my drama. But it affects every part of my being.
So you remember my runaway nephew?? Well apparently he liked it. The main reason is his girlfriend. She was taken to a group foster home far far away. They gave her the opportunity to go back to her foster parents. She took off. Of course my nephew was worried about her and took off after her. She was found at my house. It was all very dramatic. Police were involved, some shouting, some tears (well lotsa tears), and throwing themselves all over the floor was involved. My goodness.... Thought it was solved. My nephew has been coming in and out of his house as he pleases. Stays out for a couple of days, with her. My sister in law was forbidding them to see each other. That's why they claimed to be running away. Fine. She gave in, said see each other as often as you like, as long as he is home and going to school. Nope... Not good enough for them apparently.

I'm tired. It's not my child, but my nephew was practically raised with my son. He spent almost every single weekend at my house as a child. He went everywhere with me. So it's sad. I've talked to him. I've told him I love him. I would be there for him. But yesterday they decided to come to my house while nobody was there. Took showers and kicked back. Charged his phone. My mother showed up and called me immediately. I'm really upset. I'm upset that he has shown such a lack of respect. I told my sister in law, he is not allowed at my house anymore. I told her I gave him the opportunity to come live with me, if he didn't want to be with his parents. And he chooses to live in the streets. I'm tired, I can't sleep and am a nervous wreck. This girls mother calls me almost every day. She talks and talks. I've already told her, I'm done with it.

I'm not going to help my sister in law search for him. I'm not going out of my way anymore. I've been doing it. I'm exhausted.

Anywayyyyyyyy......... I'll be back..

I am very happy to announce that my son is doing very good in school and has shown great interest in being responsible. It's give and take. I've given him some freedom. It's been hard with everything going on to trust him and let him go to parties. I guess like every normal 17 year old would do. But I have to remember, he hasn't done anything wrong. Except coming home 30 mins. late, but really I shouldn't punish him for other's misguided behavior. Right?

We don't argue as much, because believe me, I have cracked teeth to show for it (I grind my teeth when I'm angry, and they are pretty much cracked, and hurt reallllllyyyy bad!) And I feel like we have a good relationship right now. I need to focus on my kids and their needs. I haven't really been there because I'm stressed or tired and it's not their fault. My husband was right. It's his brother's kid by the way.

My husband gets upset with me because my sister in law and I would stay up late going to friends houses looking for him. He was worried about me and my health. Not to mention I just had a biopsy on my foot and it was not healing well. I can understand where he was coming from.

It's done.


Stacie said...

good luck sweetie. sounds like you have done everything that you know to do for your nephew and now it is time to let go. A great Al Anon saying, let go and let god. You can't force him to do the "right" thing...and you can't spend your night worrying if he will do them or not. I know, easier said than done, but you have to detach to some degree for your own sanity and health. Love ya. Hang in there.

So glad to hear you and Lil Vic are doing so well. Give him a big hug and thank him for being a great 17 yo (omg when did he become 17?)!!

Jovi said...

i agree with stacie, hon. it's great that you've been so involved, but he's making his own choices and it's time for you to step back and draw your own lines. and YAY for lil' vic! so glad he's learning a positive lesson (would be nicer if it didn't ahve to be in this way, but still, good that he's being responsible).

Cookie's Mommy said...

I agree with the girls, you have done enough. You need to take care of YOU and your family now. Yay for getting along with Lil Vic, maybe he sees how hard it is on you how his cousin is acting?? Best of luck babe! ((hugs))